Wizard

by Benjamin Bear

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about

The evil wizards who run the music industry have gone too far! Benjamin Bear has had it up to here with this occult sorcery, and has dipped deep into his mana pool to provide the listener with some countermeasures against the evil magicks of the dark forces that seek to control the minds of America....nay, the entire world!

He can't do it alone, however....so he's enlisted the help of six of the most powerful wizards he knows. Together, they will fight the forces that threaten to claim your very soul for the ultimate darkness.

If you don't download this album, YOUR SOUL IS IN PERIL.

Δ

credits

released October 30, 2012

Produced, engineered, and mastered by Benjamin Bear at Lost Woods Studios.
All other wizards appear of their own volition.

Album cover photography by Indiana Felix Delacruz
Art design by Benjamin Bear

Special praises and spells of prosperity go to:

Rose Wylin and Lillith Bear for being awesome members of my wizarding family.
Quartz Relic, MC Wreckshin, Rappy McRapperson, Betty Rebel, and YTCracker for lending me their magic in these dark times.
...and YOU for taking a stand against the Dark Ones.

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about

Benjamin Bear Reading, Pennsylvania

In 1750, Benjamin Franklin was observed by over fifteen residents of Philadelphia as he branded an unidentified man with an Illuminati insignia. He was overheard telling one of his associates, “my work will be done once Benjamin Bear arrives to complete it.”

The reliability of these findings has been verified.

Benjamin Bear has arrived.
... more

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Track Name: Dark Forces (feat. Quartz Relic)
the big five - buzzing round in their hive
closing like a fist on these common minds
givin them a way to escape their lives
all at the same time - makin it hard to survive
the darkness - closing in - overcast - come again
eyes everywhere watchin us and we let em in
brave new world and we're all so complacent
but we know not the danger we're facing
manipulation - a standard practice
video playback dulls reactions
our perception is manifested
they know we'll accept it's all been tested
symbols, rituals, sacrifice animals
ancient evil commin back intangible
with no resistance they scheme and plot
with great plans they will turn this world to rot

There's an endless void outside your brain
With a war locked down they hide the chain
From the dawn of time till the end of your mind
There are forces at work we can never define
Close your eyes and strike the vein!
All rise for the campaign: arcane!
Manipulating hearts, so remorseless
Use your own arts and defy dark forces!

Quartz Relic:
Conceal the movement use your illusion
This is how we do it with the druid so fluent
Recognize pain next to joy, time to realize
The void will persist dont deny the otherside where
Imagination gives birth to all things
A weapon we can wield against the false kings
A shield or defense but no cursed rings
They're not worth all the madness we're demanded to bring
And yeah, sometimes I'm anti empirical
The fact we're still standing here thats a damn miracle
Don't try to tell me that your world makes sense
Everythings permitted in the absence of evidence
Logic is one key science a door
Where we walk these halls, some shine the floors
It's a cycle of revival and death comes next
With a wireless scythe man we gotta reconnect

to the - great elite
with their beast in the street
i - cast my light to distract the weak
you can't fight me
i got a nasty streak
and i don't mind makin everlasting peace
and your dichotomy has gotta be contained and ceased
cuz man has a right to be old and free
and when the crowd gets big enough to take you down
all the magic in the world won't help you now
and i be dangerous
cuz my soul is my own
you'll never get ahold of my mind it's known
you can't tempt me with glittering fallacy
or lay claim on my own mortality
you cant kill me
i will live on
even after death i will not be gone
to the blackness
you shall not win
light will always shine to keep the darkness in
Track Name: Evenstar (feat. Rappy McRapperson and MC Wreckshin)
Benjamin Bear:
get magical
spit my wizard flow
put on my wizard hat
get on my wizard robe
put my staff in the air and let the magic flow
main mage castin I gonna keep it mythical
you can't pass me the rap game gandalf
get ya hands up old like your grandma
brush the sand off rub it on your shoulders
gotta magic crystal rocked up like a boulder
makin coffee
put some magic on me
step into the middle of a grave and make a zombie
cuz this is wizardry
this ain't no bitch ass magic
gotta line around the block
and imma see em all panic
got dragon's blood
and a magic sack o wizard leaves
just what a wizard needs
to do my wizard deeds
i never physically call it into motion
may it be cuz i got that notion

Rappy McRapperson:
a young paid mage and i spray sage
smoking onna a-grade and i lead the brigade
freeing the slaves
and beating the plagues
demons and beasts they get slayed in the cave
it's so cavernous
stay so ravenous
welcome to the mage maze hazardous lazarus
and wizard biceps
they gotta stay strong
just doing reps on a fifty pound wand
on a hefty brown song
king kong vietnam
a young paid mage take my mom to prom
i shave my mom's legs
and she shaves my armpits
slap you in the face saying wizards are harmless
we farm this magic counting cabbage like a bad habit
shotgun rabbits got the haters saying "dagnabbit"
yet why do my vocals sound like crap?
bbear put a curse on my vocal tracks


MC Wreckshin:
yo im an ancient wizard from the future got my swag back
im complacent with your cooter let me take a stab at
that vag i cast my magic missle in your mana pool
i've had more children than a horny in heat animal
i have more children than that wizadry hogwart school
come at me girl my magic missle it will target you
i'm startin too conjure you inside my crystal ball
writing a new spell in my chamber think i missed your call
you thinkin i am candid but i control the seasons
everything that happened has happened for a reason
cause girl i made it so, yo girl i made it snow
conjured up a blizzard so you could not get home
yo girl you want to get all up in my robe
i'll pass on that your wizard sleeve is old
banished to the friend zone mend those feelings with my magic
you all up on my wand like you peeling a banana
Track Name: Magick Flows Eternal
i keep on casting out the same spells
that's what sells
nobody knows but time will tell
already go inside this shell
keep on it don't repel
from the days of old
i keep the magic with it
everyday for the last three thousand years
i put this wizard in it
where's your wand at?
let's get em waving all around
got a backseat full of fairy dust
and we'll all be flying now
i'm the baddest
arcanic
the wizard you can get with
i be that kind of mage that you don't want up in your business
what is up witch?
get me sick
don't play better hit me quick
i'll repel send you something more toxic than hippie chicks
i cast ridiculous
you already be there
but what is up with this
you came here to battle bbear?
you must beware
take vitamins
and work out every muscle
know who you're fighting with
this ain't no playground tussle
i'm an archmage
max level ancient power
and when it comes to magic
it's your soul i will devour

magic flows eternal
flowin outside of time
keep it powered up super swag
casting these rhymes
yo where my wizards at?
i know you're feeling this right
my whole coven is just loving what we castin tonight

yeah i can break your neck
just by movin my head
and i can summon ghouls
just by raisin the dead
my wicked sorcery
is so more than just magic
i float right up in the air so magically
and cause you to panic
take the atlantic
and transport it to venus and mars
i freed the elder gods
by realigning the stars
now what you gonna do
true wizard for real
i keep on flying high when i go by people cower in fear
i got that mana tapped upkeep always my turn
i got them creatures i can summon still got mp to burn
you cannot step to me
when i be castin these spells
i keep on blazin like a ragin lion out of its cell
this is my war cry
know all the tricks of the trade
oops i mean illusions michael i keep castin for days
don't take it serious
idiots don't be so green
because my magic flows eternal like a mountainous stream

magic flows eternal
flowin outside of time
keep it powered up super swag
casting these rhymes
yo where my wizards at?
i know you're feeling this right
my whole coven is just loving what we castin tonight
Track Name: Something Wicked (feat. Betty Rebel)
robe and wizard hat - i put it on
tricks up my sleeves and i'm bout to get blown
from the days before cops and phones
back when only legends were enshrined in poems
i rolled with gnomes in their tiny homes
all alone - with my magic tomes
chillin out with dragons and collectin gold
understatement - i am very old
now sit back smoke that look at that wand
checkin out the crystal gotta fly piece on
drawback killin that go fast gone
slip through time gonna go past dawn
can i cast this oh shit here it comes now
wicked is the shade of what's commin around
better work that search that break that bottom
something wicked gonna prey upon em


Betty Rebel:
quirky wit a staff - got my magic hat
be bendin' space and time at will for the spell craft
be chillin' in the hood - my hooded cloak - got that wizard swag
key of solomon - dark magic castin w/ my black cat
witchcraft so high - manipulatin' cosmos
conjurin' up spirits to give me blow jobs
your Malleus maleficarum - SUCK MY VAG
all the five elements got my back



stir that cauldron make it hot
bubbling up with the potion - stop
ancient runes and magic spells
demons sleep in the bowels of hell
make the sign and cast that charm
wave that wand come and chant that song
wizards witches fluid motion
summon gods from beneath the ocean
twerk that work that make em all dance
cast hellfire from an arcane stance
twist that wrist back incant hard
capture souls in a crystal shard
earth crack burn black turn back time
undead creatures and creeping vines
lightning frightening conjure up
something wicked this way comes
Track Name: The Once and Future King (feat. Rose Wylin)
time traveler
known wizard
defender of camelot's king his mind shimmers
destiny shall bring the light giver
he travels backwards up through time's river
anachronistic master of magic
going through states the fates align tragic
family sometimes comes back to hurt you
wizards know that honor is virtue
would you pick and choose the same path now
knowing that the banner wasn't passed on down
knowing that the magic here just can't be found
knowing that the wizards here are underground
the flame that would motivate here will it save
the world from stepping into its grave?
the same way that you helped us back then
would you still believe in the goodness of men?

and in a timeless spring
time stops and our minds still lean
to camelot
everyday we sing
of the once and future king
and in our darkest hour
we still draw on your mighty power
your wisdom
was your greatest thing
for the once and future king

Rose Wylin:

Every wizard has a pastime -- Merlin's is to knit n grime
makin night-caps with that knit, purl swag shine
keepin' it real in his arcane robes
Bespectacled magician turnin' haters into toads
Sittin' cozy in our coop, sippin syrup, gurl it's teatime,
high time
We learn that fighting doesn't always equal power
only thing to do is just to make the future brighter
got a sad he'll tell you just to sit and ponder
why the raven is just like the writing desk, ya ever wonder?
Prophetic wanderer, Living backwards n inside out
baddest wizard in the hemisphere, drippin' in clout
bending minds into pretzels
and dabbling in the celestial.
Got your back in a pinch, yo own atticus finch.
all the witches wanna get that ish
swag so potent, it comin out his fingertips

and in a timeless spring
time stops and our minds still lean
to camelot
everyday we sing
of the once and future king
and in our darkest hour
we still draw on your mighty power
your wisdom
was your greatest thing
for the once and future king

evil waits for the minute it can fight back
power can corrupt it's enough tp turn the mind black
who can say if the way you can ride is
better than le fay with her anger to blindness
straight to the mindless fate is a kindness
the battle rages the age is timeless
finding the sign is a sword encased in
stone and a rock with a fate your facing
pull it out
and defend all doubt
descend on your enemies
they fall down
depend on the entity don't stray never seen
sixteen centuries still in our memories
shining a mind like a golden star
the courage to collect and respect this heart
still in high esteem even though they schemers
sorcerer born to protect these dreamers

and in a timeless spring
time stops and our minds still lean
to camelot
everyday we sing
of the once and future king
and in our darkest hour
we still draw on your mighty power
your wisdom
was your greatest thing
for the once and future king
Track Name: Funky Wizards (feat. Quartz Relic)
I'm a magical man with two magical hands
and i've come to spread magic all over the land
since the days of old sprites and elves
i bring the fire so you might wanna check yourself
i'm too funky
but all these witches love me
down ass wizards can't get enough of me
hocus - straight to the pocus
can't see me? y'all better focus
locusts - i bringing plagues to the haters
an ill rhyme sayer - grip the main layer
al'thae teock tomuss ilvo lie kair
i keep it hot like a dragon's lair
still immortal but i'm young enough
to save kingdoms and bring them the funky stuff
no illusions - this is real ass magic
y'all just mad cuz you just don't have it

We some funky wizards / when you steppin to us you better check yourself
for if you keep on steppin / we will cast an exit spell and you'll end up in hell

(Quartz Relic)
The rage of a black mage, I'll poop where I wanna
All over your pizza watch me ruin a katana
With my ten pound iguanas, bred in osaka
I'm summonin Quetzalcoatl with these golden maraccas
Yo when I'm rollin through go and shake that staff
I'll be sippin on cold brews watching grass turn black
Dropped bombs with Rydia so I went to Mysidia
Got more than I could handle so they turned me to an animal
Getttin my beast mode on you might call me Jesus,
but honestly I'm more of a penis
Put my wand in a cup I tend to cleanse diseases
Fuck birds and bees I'm teaching all the young wizards
About the worlds of skeez, and ralph bakshi
Obscene like Palpatine I keep the spellbook nasty
Shivers up my spine i got em binded tightly
So succubi dont leave me dying when they ride me


Time stops - i'll rewind and reverse it
been so long - no need to rehearse it
i got it perfect there is no copy
dark forces - they can't stop me
they keep trying to break these spells
but their fate foretells of a great farewell
we can all tell - they won't succeed
cuz a light will shine in our time of need
and the ancient ways will carry us
to a brand new age of wisdom
this magic's made for tearing up
and breaking down the system
through my prism - i can see it all
their time is up when the kingdom falls
just heed the call - we beaming up
better check yourself when you step to us
Track Name: Ancient Power Mage Swag (feat. YTCracker)
Ancient power mage swag now I conjure up
Centuries of knowledge no your college ain't enough
This is real magic ain't no Harry Potter wannabes
Masterin the arts I got the power up inside of me
Rap game sorcery / Throwin hot fire
Chillin with my wizards in our magical attire
Ice, lightning, master of the elements
haters on my robe but they just ain't relevant
wizard leaf - and i'm flaming it proper
potions to the face cuz i'm a big shopper
outer space hot like mercury
burns like third degree
witches wanna marry me
rollin through time - ancient ruins
in the present - so what we doin
casting magic - number one speller
takin shots to the face - old yeller


y'all can't hang with me
'less you a mage
black ones, white ones, red and blue - hey
i don't discriminate - no anger
look boy this is my world - topanga
been a W back from the stone age
where they don't play
club all day
up onstage twerkin on a model
blast through time better work that throttle
jerk that bottle
come rub it all up
trolls in the house
i fuck em all up
j k - got love for the troll game
t's in the house put your hands up - role play
get your wands out - know u got em
wave em all around to the ground - hit bottom
got a fat sack! - of magic leaves
and i don't really care if they mad at me


YTCracker:
cooking in the cauldron with an eye of newt
creating a concoction with the latest loot
im astute well read im a student its said
that the path to enlightenment is all in the head
so you might catch this wizard sippin
on the potion riding round the kingdom on a griffin
prestidigitation is my mission
bitch im a magician with the magic pimpin
robe and thy hat thy rod and thy staff
just a few of the accessories i rock on behalf
of the wizard college that i graduated back in A.D. three
not eighty - im immortal you see
im immoral to some degree
and i use up all my powers on that orally
symbols on the gi go astral
ben bear let em have it from our castle
Track Name: Theme from "Police Wizard"
lemme tell you bout a man who's laying the law down
wizarding officer serving his hometown
magic powers holding it down this force trusted
in the city crime don't pay it gets you busted
these criminals they must be insane to think
their campaign of terror could maintain the streets
because this wizard got tricks way up his sleeve
and they will receive a one way ticket to leave
it's supernatural taking out the pimps and hustlers
no good badniks and ol jimmy rustlers
his wizard style is always guaranteed dynamite
better leave the city if you know you ain't actin right
i pity the fool who tries to damage the rule
of law and order in the border of this city and duel
he keeps it manifest - cuz that's his destiny
if you doin evil then you'll become his enemy

crime don't pay
and this wizard don't play

he got his robe on helping out the boys in blue
make some noise for this wizard if you know what he do
he keep the streets safe for kids and old ladies
takin out the psychos who just wanna kill babies
there's no case too big and no case to small
all you do is summon he will answer your call
i know you need that - and he's defending the innocent
it's evident - he can conjure the evidence
and make it stick - no more corruption of politics
and money to follow it - he'll get rid of all of it
so call him in - he's just the man for the job
upholding the law and watching criminals fall
he'll get all of the people who go bump in the night
only man around - who gives evil a fright
you know they named him - police wizard for real
he's the kind of wizard make the crime disappear